Estimated Reading Time: 2-3 minutes. My sister has a group of people she calls The Crew. For years they met weekly for brunch to catch up. I never knew exactly what they had to catch up on since they were a social entity, going everywhere together except to sleep and to work. Seriously, “what toothpaste did you use this morning?” seemed the extent of their possible conversations. But then again, they were all pretty serious into television shows, politics, and music.
In contrast to their metropolitan, mostly single professional lifestyle, my rural, baby-birthin’ life was drab. But that’s not my point.
My point is, she had a crew. It was her group. Her adult professional equivalent of the high school caste system (burn outs, band people, choir people, the actors, etc. We’ve all seen The Breakfast Club). Early in my mommying career, I didn’t have a crew. I had two energetic boys and hadn’t found a niche. My sister had two things I coveted:
Trustworthy friends that she could hang with regularly.
Enough of said friends to call The Crew.
Hmph.
Guess what? Now I have four energetic boys, a giggly baby girl, and I have a crew. Except it’s not a crew.
It’s a circle. It’s my inner circle. The group of women who are my collective brain. The women who are my quilting bee. I call them The Inner Circle. We don’t have lunch every Saturday. We don’t attend concerts. We barely see each other, and when we do it’s surrounding another event to maximize our time. We reschedule or cancel a LOT. Some of them live far away. Some on my street. Others are in between. Some are married. Some are not. Some have children. Some not.
But I am never homesick, never alone, never forgotten. Not being forgotten is critical.
My sister and her crew have moved on with their lives, marriages, promotions, relocations, and they don’t stay as cohesive as once they did. Last weekend my sister and a couple of folks from The Crew were to meet for breakfast. They got a confirmation the night before that one member would be there in the AM. He’s never late. Never. My sister was 10 minutes late…and he wasn’t there.
Long story short, they went to his place, and found a neighbor with a key, called the police and ambulance…The Crewmember had slept through his glucose meter warning. He awoke because of the alarm going off when they “broke in.” When treated by the EMTs, he had a blood glucose level of 52. Danger zone is 60.
They didn’t say, “Oh well, he must’ve decided not to come.” Nope, they knew each other so well…their patterns, their problems, that they knew to respond.
I’m not an idiot. I know someone is reading this post in tears, wishing they had a crew, an inner circle. I am praying for you. For the loneliness to come to an end. For you not to feel desperate for friendship. For you to not settle for less than what you deserve in a friend or a mate. I spent 2-1/2 years waiting for my circle to appear. And even then, it took time to build and develop. But it was worth the wait. I have friends…the real kind, the true blue kind. And you can, too. Tell God (and if you don’t know him, test him with this one) that you need a crew. He’ll provide it. You won’t even realize it’s happening. Then, a couple years from now, you’ll realize how much fun you had over brunch with your friends. Wait a minute, you’ll think, I have a crew. Oh my gosh! I have a crew. An inner circle of my very own!
And I’ll be rejoicing with you!
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